OK,

now that I've stopped running around my house naked, screaming "Matt Welch is still an assclown! The Sox are in the play offs!" let me say that I truly hope the Halos get it done. I don't just want the Angels to overtake Oakland, I want them to beat out the Twinkies so I can knock the snot out of Welch's precious little Kinky Eckstein and the Anaheim Jewboys as an appetizer before I feast on what is known in the Bronx as "the starting rotation."

And once the Sox have laid waste to the Bombers, I want St Louis. I want to gnaw on LaRussa's skull and drag Edmonds by his blonde highlights through the Fens. I want Johnny Pesky to die smiling. I want my aunt Jane to live out her last decade or two in peace.

But more than anything I want to go into Yankee Stadium next summer and start a chant of "Two-ooo thou-sand! Two-ooo thou-sand!